What is Psychosexual Somatics®?

"The mind is like the wind and the body like the sand:  
if you want to know how the wind is blowing, 
you can look at the sand"
Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen

As founder of Psychosexual Somatics® Therapy, I have distilled years of study and practice into a powerful, fast, effective method for resolving sex and intimacy issues.  The pioneering approach draws from psychotherapy, neuroscience, trauma therapy, osteopathy, myofascial release, energy psychology and clinical sexology.  Nowhere else can you find such a effective reduction of these disciplines into such an efficient tool for healing sexual problems.

The work is short-term, usually between one and six three-hour intensives will resolve most sex and intimacy issues.

Emotional wounds and feelings are experienced and stored as much in the body as they are in the mind. I use a combination of psychotherapeutic and bodywork techniques to release these memories in a mindful and gentle manner and within a safe and boundaried space.

Many sexual issues manifest in the body – but they frequently arise from the mind. Only by addressing both mind and body can we effectively heal.

Even in the first session most clients are able to have new insights into limiting patterns of behaviour and how these are affecting their present situation.  I want to empower you to make changes for your future.  Psychosexual Somatics® Therapy is the best way I know how to do that.

Client Outcomes

Although every client has different needs and each person has their own individual outcome from the work, the results of Psychosexual Somatics® Therapy can broadly be categorised as follows:
  • Physiological – resolving: pelvic pain, early ejaculation issues, erectile problems, post-partum or post-operative trauma. Decreased PTSD or trauma-related symptoms. Allowing enhanced pleasure, sexual satisfaction and orgasmic function
  • Intra-personal – enhanced sense of: self, self-confidence, enhanced libido, body confidence, creativity, personal empowerment, connection their body. Resolving sexual, physical or emotional abuse issues
  • Inter-personal – ability to allow intimacy, to have nourishing relationships, greater communication skills
  • Social – clearer boundaries, increased productivity in the workplace, loss of shame around sexual identity and appropriate sexual self-expression

Five Stages

My method is a unique combination of techniques from both psychotherapeutic and bodywork disciplines.

The process involves five distinct stages, leading to the resolution of most sexual and intimacy issues.
  • Awareness of blocks through psychotherapeutic processes
  • Connection with embodiment through Somatic Awareness 
  • Removal of emotional and physical blockages through physical therapy
  • Re-connection to and awakening of the body through Erotic Mindfulness
  • Enabling sexual empowerment and cultivating enhanced pleasure responses through bodywork and other methods
 An important aspect of my role as a Psychosexual Somatics® Practitioner is to ensure that you feel completely safe in the container of our sessions. It is of paramount importance that your boundaries are respected at all times during this work. During a session, I work with the physical, personal, emotional and transcendent by providing a loving, accepting space which enables healing to occur. 

Working with each client varies enormously and there is no typical session, but elements that we work with may include:
  • Psychotherapeutic techniques
  • Deep tissue bodywork and myofascial release
  • Breathing and movement exercises
  • Gentle, compassionate holding
  • Full body, including vaginal, bodywork

Why Work with a Man?

When men have harmed women so much on both personal and cultural levels, you may ask – why trust a man to heal these wounds? The answer is, in part, because some wounds caused by men can only be healed by a man who re-models the masculine in a healthy, respectful manner. The essence of the mature masculine is being present, focused and having clear intention. When doing this work, I am deeply present, I witness without judgement and offer guidance and support. I create safety and facilitate your healing process, embracing whatever may arise. When working with the body, unexpected emotions can be released: grief, rage, pain can all arise and be released in the safety of the session space. Being witnessed and affirmed in this healing by a masculine presence can not only heal these wounds but awaken the empowered feminine which resides in every woman.

Learning to Say No

In each session you will be encouraged to reclaim your power. This is done in part by being able to define your own boundaries. Through processes which will connect you with what feels right for you in each moment, you will be able to define and state your boundaries clearly – and know that they will be respected. This simple exercise allows you to reclaim your power in being able to say NO! The increased self-confidence can in itself heal wounds.